Written by Natasha Lim
Edited by Eunice Tan
You feel that familiar flutter in your stomach as your heart begins to thump loudly and a strange heat spreads across your face. Immediately, you wrack your brains, trying to recall the advice you’ve frantically Googled a thousand times before. Should I say hi? How do I say hi? Wait, which side is my good side again??
Okay, not everyone may have this experience but, allow me to make this generalization – you know when you have a crush, when you’ve found your “heart’s desire,” your “kindred spirit,” your “soulmate,” whatever… but the real question is – how do you know if s/he likes you?
When you have a crush, one of the most common things to do (and everyone with decent internet access has done, don’t lie) is Google ‘how to know if your crush likes you back?’ There are tons and tons of advice and articles online sharing the little tips and tricks on how to recognize attraction when you see it. They highlight the little behavioural quirks to take note of and attempt to break down the entire science of human attraction in less than 500 words:
- They send you texts with cute emojis – Ooooo, s/he sent a blushing smiley emoji instead of the regular smiley! S/he must like me!
- They reply your messages quickly – It’s been 20 minutes since my last text, s/he hates me…
- They interact with you often on social media – S/he’s shared three memes with me today! I must be so special!
- B L A H
You put yourself through so much, scrutinizing their every move and trying to peer into their heads (like a huge creep). Well, you can stop it now, because I have the answer.
How to tell if your crush likes you back?
If they like you, you’ll know; if they don’t, you’ll be confused.
That’s it – it’s that simple. Stop wasting time stressing, wondering, pouring over text messages, and drowning yourself in “mixed signals.” When I first came across this piece of advice (from the internet, lol finally something good from there), I was honestly a little mind blown at how straightforward it is. No need to mope and sigh, no need to crack my head. That’s just the truth of the matter.
Now, you might try to tell yourself, “they’re busy or they’re shy or they’re intimidated.” At this point, you’re just making excuses for them. Nope, if you’re upfront and honest with who you are and they don’t seem to be taking any special interest in you then, chances are they’re not that into you.
So, MOVE ON!
Take the time and effort that you would have spent on them to do something else – work on yourself, start a new hobby, hang out with people who you know for sure like you for you. And yes, I get it’s not easy to just ‘up and leave’ and yes, it may sting a little like rejection. But hey, it makes so much more sense to focus on yourself in this season of your life than to pick the hypothetical petals of your hypothetical flower, wondering if your hypothetical girl/boyfriend ‘loves you or loves you not.’